what hurt …

it’s not the things you said that hurt,
certainly not the way you treated me.
not the way you loved me…
or the memories we made together,
it’s not your tears that broke my heart,
it’s the smile from your eyes…
when you didn’t know i could see you,
it’s how you said those words,
the arguments we left unattended,
it’s the way you called my name …
like i left a bad taste on your tongue,
it’s the way you tiptoed around me…
because walking on your feet meant my breaking.
it’s not that i did not love you,
it’s that i couldn’t the way you wanted,
it’s that no matter how much love i have,
i’d still come up short,
i’d still leave you in want,
and i’d rather hurt than let you…
i just wish I knew then,
that I deserved to be loved just as much or even more
and maybe, things would have been different…
just maybe …
it wouldn’t have hurt this much

Diana M

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7 Comments

    1. You know what I realized as I read through again today – things would have been different if I knew about deserving love and to be loved but it would have hurt just as much.

      Liked by 2 people

  1. Tugging on my heart strings with this one! Ahhh such a beautiful yet succinct way to describe the feeling of not being loved the way one deserves or not knowing you are capable of receiving such love in the first place. This is something many young people like ourselves struggle with.
    Thanks for sharing! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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